WORK-LIFE BALANCE FOR MOMS: WHY HUSTLE CULTURE ISN’T WORKING

As working moms, we all share the intense pressure to succeed. Hustle culture tells us that success only comes through relentless hard work, side hustles, and constant productivity.

Hustle culture is failing moms by convincing us that we must fulfill all these expectations:

• Work a full-time job.
• Start a side business.
• Care for our children.
• Keep a picture-perfect home.
• Relax luxuriously.

However, these impossible standards lead to burnout, guilt, and exhaustion. We all need to find a better way, a sustainable balance that doesn’t push us to the edge. It is okay to admit when something isn’t working for us.

WHAT IS HUSTLE CULTURE, AND WHY IS IT NOT WORKING FOR MOMS?

Hustle culture is everywhere. Society and social media bombard us with the message that success comes only from working harder, longer hours, and pursuing side hustles. It glorifies the idea of “doing it all” and paints entrepreneurship as the ultimate path to freedom. For many moms, this leads to the belief that we need to run a successful business on top of our full-time jobs and family responsibilities.

But hustle culture wasn’t designed for moms. It overlooks the reality that many of us have kids who depend on us and need more subtle and gentle parts of us, households that need managing, and very little time for the endless grind. The hustle culture is failing moms because it sets us up for impossible standards. The demand to work as if we have no children and care for our children as if we have no jobs is simply unsustainable.

I’d like to share a personal story that might resonate with many of you. I am a single mom of three school-aged children working full-time in an IT company. Like many moms, society told me that the path to freedom was through entrepreneurship. So, I tried. During the pandemic, I obtained certification as a health coach and launched my coaching side gig, hoping that starting my business would give me the flexibility to look after my children.

But instead of freedom, I found myself more drained than ever. Working from early morning to late at night, even on weekends, trying to make everything fit. The pressure to succeed, build a business, and gain financial stability left me with little time for my life. I developed a vitamin D deficiency (you can read the full story here) because I barely went outside, and I had parental burnout. I used to feel guilty when I didn’t spend enough time with my kids or work on my business. The hustle was exhausting.

And here’s the truth: it didn’t work.

The pressure to succeed in all areas left me burnt out and feeling like I was failing at everything.

However, I have learned valuable lessons, such as caring for yourself if you feel emotionally exhausted or burned out. Remember, your well-being is just as important as your responsibilities.

WHY HUSTLE CULTURE ISN’T WORKING FOR MOMS?

The hustle culture pushes the narrative that we should work harder, longer, and faster to succeed. It doesn’t account for the mental load we carry or the fact that we have responsibilities that can’t simply be pushed aside.

Unrealistic expectations lead to burnout

Hustle culture promotes the idea that working harder will solve everything, but this is different for moms, primarily single moms. We are already balancing full-time jobs and parenting, often without additional help. The idea of adding a side business, a social media presence, or a personal brand on top of that is overwhelming.

Burnout is real. Pushing ourselves to work harder without acknowledging the need for rest leads to physical and emotional exhaustion.

Moms are not failing because they aren’t hustling hard enough. They are burning out because they are trying to do too much.

The “do it all” myth is toxic

Social media often glorifies moms who seem to have it all together: raising kids, running businesses, and maintaining spotless homes. It is a global trend. We don’t see the real struggles, the late nights, and the emotional toll it takes. The reality is that the “do it all” mentality is not only unrealistic but also toxic. It leads to feelings of inadequacy when we inevitably fall short.

Moms are not immune to the pressures of hustle culture, but we don’t have to let it define our lives. Hustle culture sets unrealistic expectations, but by focusing on balance over busyness, we can redefine success in a way that honors our health, happiness, and family.

SO, HOW TO REDEFINE WORK-LIFE BALANCE?

It is clear why hustle culture isn’t working for moms, but that doesn’t mean we must stay stuck in a burnout cycle. There are healthier, more sustainable ways to achieve success while honoring our roles as moms and taking care of our well-being.

Let’s discover some.

1. SET BOUNDARIES

Boundaries are our best friend when balancing work and family life. Clear boundaries with work, family, and even yourself help protect your time and energy.

• Work boundaries: if you work from home, establish clear work hours and communicate them to your employer and family. When work ends, close the laptop and mentally switch to family time.

• Family boundaries: let your family know you need uninterrupted time while working. Create visual signals, like a “Do not disturb” sign or an open/closed door policy, to help younger kids understand.

• Try the Pomodoro technique: work for 25-minute intervals, then take a 5-minute break. It helps you stay productive without feeling overwhelmed.

• Avoid overcommitting: taking on too many responsibilities is easy, but overcommitting leads to exhaustion. Set realistic limits on how much you can handle without feeling overwhelmed.

2. FOCUS ON PROGRESS, NOT PERFECTION

The idea that we need to excel in every area of life—career, parenting, home—is unrealistic. Shifting your mindset from perfection to progress is key to maintaining sanity.

• Progress over perfection: some days, just completing a few tasks is a victory. On other days, progressing while being present for your kids after a long work day is a victory.

• Celebrate the small wins: know that success doesn’t come all at once. At the end of each day, write down three things you accomplished—no matter how small. This practice helps shift your focus from what’s left undone to what you’ve achieved.

3. OUTSOURCE AND DELEGATE WITHOUT GUILT

You don’t have to do it all alone. Outsourcing tasks or asking for help doesn’t mean you’re failing. It just mean you are being smart with your time and energy.

• Delegate to family: teach your kids to handle age-appropriate chores to lighten your load and teach them responsibility.

• Outsourcing when possible: whether grocery delivery, hiring a cleaner once a month, or meal-prep services—helps you save time and stress.

• Use a task management app like Trello or Todoist to assign tasks to family members and track what’s getting done.

4. PRIORITIZE SELF-CARE TO REFUEL ENERGY

Self-care isn’t a luxury. It’s essential. Putting yourself last is easy as a mom, but you can’t pour from an empty cup. Regular self-care helps prevent burnout and energizes you for work and family.

• Make time for yourself, even if it’s just 10-15 minutes a day, carve out time to do something that brings you joy—whether reading, meditating, or simply sitting with a cup of tea.

• Schedule self-care like any other appointment on your calendar. Treat it as a non-negotiable “me time.”

For more tips on creating a healthy routine, check out 20 relaxing activities to unwind and enjoy here.

5. LET GO OF THE PRESSURE TO HUSTLE

The truth is that hustle culture is a lie that tells us we’re only worthy if we’re constantly working and striving. But success doesn’t have to come at the expense of your health and happiness.

• Redefine success: success isn’t about doing everything perfectly or meeting society’s impossible standards. It’s about finding a balance that works for you, your family, and your life.

• Create a vision board of what success looks like for you—both in your career and personal life. It could be spending more time with your kids, improving your health, or advancing your career. Use it as a reminder of your true goals, not what society tells you to achieve.

6. CREATE A FLEXIBLE ROUTINE THAT WORKS FOR YOUR FAMILY

The routine doesn’t have to be rigid. A flexible routine helps you manage work, family, and self-care without feeling overwhelmed.

• Adapt your routine: build a routine that adapts to your family’s changing needs. Create anchor points for important daily activities, such as morning routines, mealtimes, and bedtime, to structure your day while allowing flexibility.

• Use time blocking to create dedicated time slots for different activities. If something unexpected happens (as it often does with kids), adjust the blocks rather than feeling like the whole day is lost.

7. BUILD A SUPPORT NETWORK

A solid support network is essential, whether it’s a community of fellow moms, a mentor, or a group of friends. You don’t have to do everything alone; seeking support is a sign of strength, not weakness.

• Schedule regular meet-ups with friends or fellow moms, even if they’re virtual. Sharing experiences helps reduce isolation and stress.

• Join a mom support group, either online or in person. Finding a group of moms who understand your struggles can provide emotional support, encouragement, and practical tips.

8. PLAN FAMILY ACTIVITIES TO RECONNECT

I love this one because I miss time with my kids while hustling so much! It is easy to feel disconnected from your kids when you are busy with work. Still, please remember to plan regular family activities to stay connected and enjoy quality time together.

• Plan leisure walks. Something as simple as a walk after dinner can allow you to hear your kids’ thoughts and stories. It is a way to bond while also giving you all the time to unwind.

• Schedule recurring family activities such as playing games, going to the park, having a picnic, or watching a movie. The key is to spend intentional time together.

9. EMBRACE “DOLCE FAR NIENTE” (THE SWEETNESS OF DOING NOTHING)

In our fast-paced, productivity-driven world, it’s easy to feel we need to do something constantly.

But one of the most powerful practices I embraced is the concept of dolce far niente, the sweetness of doing nothing. This simple practice helps me return to my roots, grounding me in the present and allowing me to focus on what really matters: inner peace and being with my children.

• What is Dolce Far Niente? It’s the Italian idea of savoring the beauty of doing nothing—whether snuggling with your child, going for an unplanned walk, or just sitting quietly, enjoying the moment.
• Regularly slow down and enjoy moments of stillness. Let go of the pressure to always be productive and embrace the joy of simply being present with your family. Go for ice cream with your kids, take an unplanned walk in nature, or enjoy a lazy afternoon at home together. These moments, though they may seem small, are where life truly happens.

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FINAL NOTES

In general, hustle culture tells us we must do more, achieve more, and constantly push ourselves to the limit. However, moms need a different approach that values balance, self-care, and meaningful connections with family. Hustle culture also measures success by how much you get done, but as moms, our to-do lists are never-ending. Instead of measuring success by how many tasks you complete, focus on meaningful productivity.

What are the things that matter most today?

After years of trying to make entrepreneurship work while holding a corporate job, I realized that stability matters. For many moms, especially single moms like me, staying in a corporate job with a predictable paycheck is a better option. The security of knowing that bills are covered and there’s food on the table is invaluable.

There’s no shame in choosing stability over the hustle. You don’t need to quit your job and dive into entrepreneurship to be successful. You are re already successful by providing for your family and doing your best. It’s okay to let go of the guilt or fear of judgment that society or social media may impose. Your worth is not determined by how much you hustle but by the love and care you provide for your family and yourself.